In a good edition of music, like in the Mahler, our 40-something pages of music are stapled together. Week three out of six is nearly done, and as our viola teacher likes to say, we’re “past the staples”.

I love week three. Gradually, people are spending less time in the practice rooms as they’re getting a handle on their music, and more time getting to know everyone else in the orchestra. On our last day off, I found myself moving from group to group with a mug of coffee in the dining hall following dinner. Finally, I’m talking to all those people that I don’t see during rehearsal. “Oh that’s you playing first on that piece? You sound great!” The name/face/playing puzzle is slowly being completed.

Personalities are also coming out of the woodwork like never before. The annual NYOC Idol competition took place last Wednesday, with so many excellent entries that by the end of it, there was no way I could pick a winner. Just when you thought you knew someone, they run on stage in ill-fitting clothes, a wig that made its debut in last year’s show, and sing Thunderstruck to harp accompaniment with the lyrics written on both arms. And that was just the opening act. In the end, a celtic group featuring a real smorgasbord of instruments and a dancer to top it off took the prize.

I was speaking with Kate Frobeen, a clarinettist, about the new string quartet program. I have to paraphrase her because what she said was much better than anything I could come up with, and for once, I didn’t have a post-it note to write down her exact words at the time: “When we’re watching student concerts at school, we get used to a variety of levels; you’ve got a couple of good performances, some average, and some terrible performances. While watching the string quartets the other night, I kept waiting for the terrible performances, but they never happened!”

I’ve definitely been bitten by the inspiration bug again this year, much like Brennan alluded to below. This year was my worst year in terms of school and playing, with three months spent bedridden and way too much time unable to play my instrument every time this mysterious thing happened. The problem was finally resolved just before the beginning of NYOC so here I am with more hope than I’ve ever known and I’m rubbing shoulders with the most encouraging students, staff and faculty you’ll ever find on one campus, let alone under one roof.

With less than one week before our first performance, we are having two to three full orchestra rehearsals a day. The orchestra is sounding great, and I wish our session was just a little longer. I guess this is where I get the urge to play in a professional orchestra: so I can meet up with them again!

Do you ever have those moments?  Those moments in life that you just wish you could freeze?  Have you ever had those times in your life when you're doing something, whatever it may be, and all of a sudden you realize that it's all going to be okay?  That you're on the right path?  That what you are trying to accomplish is worthwhile and is the best thing you can be doing with your time to serve other people?  That there's someone looking out for you?

I tend to doubt myself when it comes to my life and my choice to forge towards an orchestral career.  I begin to think of the many things that stand in my way.  I think of all of the effort that I have put forth already and then think of all the people that are still better than me.  It's tough when you know you struggle with nerves.  For me, it's the stage fright.  I tend to be able to nail things in the practice room and then when I get on stage, I choke it.  The beginning of this year's session has been terrifying in that regard.  With so many big percussion parts in our section, I've been nervously awaiting my chance to play some of them with the orchestra.  With us getting together so quickly I haven't had the time to really digest the music before being thrust into rehearsal where I need to nail it.  I felt pretty uncomfortable in the first week of rehearsals finding myself playing timidly and tending to always be worried.  That being said, the maestro and the orchestra are wonderful.  I mean, when reading nobody is pointing fingers.  I mean, my part didn't go any worse than anybody else's part.  But knowing that doesn't stop you from not wanting to let them down or from giving yourself a hard time.  We're musicians.  We were born to succeed the first time.  Or at least try to....  And so I found myself leaving rehearsals frustrated with myself and deflated.  I felt like I wasn't good enough and hadn't practiced.  

Then, it happened....

I was sitting in a faculty concert and listening to a piece for violin and cello by a lesser known Soviet composer named Reinhold Glière.  A guy I don't even know.  I mean, I've heard of him so I sort of know him.  Let's just say we're not on a first name basis or anything.  I was exhausted and frustrated and so I just closed my eyes.  The second movement came and went and I was stunned.  It was certainly one of the most moving things I've ever experienced.  Steve Sitarski and David Hetherington made one of those moments for me.  Everything was going to be okay.  Somehow...I just got it...and life....it all made sense.  Afterwards, I thought some more about it and realized that these moments, these lifelong moments, were everywhere.  Why?  

Because this place...this orchestra...it makes those moments.  

They're all over the place.  Whether at a concert and inspired by a virtuosic clarinet, basset horn and piano trio or listening to the strings in the Andante movement of Mahler 6, I begin to realize why I'm here.  I've found more moments while listening to the faculty tell us stories and encourage us during the round table discussioin.  It is so easy to see their love for this music.  My friend Corey and I were talking about why we love this place so much and it's because the faculty are so excited about their passion themselves.  They so badly want to share their love for music with us that it just works by osmosis.  They are people that encourage us to follow our dreams and to share our joy with other people.  Isn't that wonderful advice?  And it means I'm also much more comfortable in orchestra....because I don't have to worry.

Sometimes these moments occur away from the music.  I was walking by the river on our day off and again found myself in the beauty of this world.  Blue heron, rushing water, nature standing still.  It was so peaceful.  I began to realize how lucky I am to be able to play music and to have this opportunity.  These moments are inspiring and they cement in my inner being that my career choice is going to turn out to be okay.  In fact, I have come to the comprehension that I experience these special moments so that I come to an understanding of how I can create them for other people.   

I could go on about the many more of these times that continue to remind me about the beauty of this thing we call music.  But the short of it is this.  This place is invaluable not only because it gives us the technical training and repertoire insight but because it reminds us of who we are and it teaches us purpose, fuels our passion and inspires us to touch people's lives with what we care about so much.

Can it get any better?

Today we had a little break from all of our orchestral playing. A special guest came to coach us on madrigals, which is a form of vocal music from the Renaissance. In addition to learning two madrigals with the entire orchestra, we were divided into small groups to prepare short madrigals on our own. We were told to present the madrigal in any form we wanted. Most groups involved instruments, some chose jazz, others involved acting and interesting "dance" moves. All in all, it was a lot of fun and everyone enjoyed themselves.

In the evening, the entire orchestra presented the two madrigals. An excellent faculty concert followed. We are very lucky to have such an amazing faculty, and it is always a pleasure to listen to them perform.

As we enter week 3, it is hard to believe that next Thursday, we will be starting our tour. We have made a lot of progress, but we still have a lot of work to do!

It's hard to believe almost two weeks ago, 100 or so strangers from across Canada gathered in London, Ontario to play in a symphony orchestra together. It is my first year in the NYOC and I had no idea what to expect. I had a few concerns. Could I practice enough without my arm falling off? Could I learn the repertoire on time? Would I get along with the other members of the orchestra?

I now know that I had no reason to worry. As members of the NYOC, we are treated extremely well. We receive 3 delicious meals day (I swear they are trying to make us fat), we are taught by amazing coaches and taken care of by a fun, yet strict staff. Best of all, thanks to the NYOC's sponsors, this is all provided to us through a scholarship.

Our schedule goes something like this: Wake-up, eat, practice, eat some more, practice, eat some more, practice, and finally, sleep. But this is in no way tedious for us. One of the amazing things about this program is that every single person wants to be here. I rarely hear a conversation that does not involve music to some extent.  The environment here is just right. There is not too much competition. Everyone wants to practice 8 hours a day. Everyone wants to sound good so that the orchestra can sound its best. Not to mention, the people are all very nice. We share so much in common and everyone is easy to get along with.

The good news is that my arm is still attached. But I am tired, and I think most of the members of the orchestra are feeling that to some extent. Playing so much puts a lot of strain on the body no matter how relaxed you are. Lucky for us, there is an athletic therapist available for those who need help and there are many different ways to keep active. My favourite is Ultimate Frisbee. Although not so great for the fingers, it is a lot of fun and it gets you moving around. Every once in a while we get some time off and last Sunday, a small group of us went swimming.

Unfortunately it has been cold or rainy here for the most part, but we're all hoping it will warm up a bit.

The NYOC has been an amazing experience so far and I am very grateful that I am a part of it.